Long Jokes

A boaj visiting Las Vegas for the first time walks up to a Coke machine and puts in a coin. Out pops a coke.

The boaj looks amazed and runs away to get some more coins. He returns and starts feeding the machine madly, and of course, the machine keeps popping out the drinks.

Another person walks up behind the boaj and watches his antics for a few minutes before stopping him and asking if someone else could have a go.

The boaj spins around and shouts, "Can't you see I'm winning?"



There were two boajes who inherited their father's farm after he passed away But after only a year, the animals started to die. The farm was falling apart.

The boajes counted their money and found that they only had 600 dollars. So they put their heads together. "I've got it!" said Benny "I'll go find a bull to breed with our cattle and build the livestock up. Our farm will be back to normal in no time."

"How will we do that?" asked Buster.

"I'll go find a bull and when I do I'll call you. You hook up the trailer to the truck and come get the bull." So they agreed on the plan. A couple of weeks later the Benny left on heis journey to find the bull. He looked high and low for a bull, but there were no bulls that fit his expectations. Finally he found a bull he wanted. "How much?" he asked the farmer.

"Well, I don't think I could take a penny less than 599 dollars," said the farmer.

"Great! I'll still have one dollar left. I'll take him!" Benny was so excited that he grabbed the bull and started heading into town. "How are you going to get the bull home without a trailer?" "Well," said the boaj, "I'm going to call my brother and tell him to hitch the trailer up to the truck and come get us." "Long distance charges are five to six dollars." "Well, then I'll send a telegram".

Benny walked into town to the post office to send his telegram. "I need to send a telegram. I need it to say that I found a bull and I need my brother to hitch up the trailer to the truck and come get us. Here are the directions." She handed the postman the directions. "How much will that be?"

"Its 99 cents per word," said the postman. The boaj was so mad. How was he supposed to get home if he couldn't get Buster to come? He slammed her head down on the table, he had to think of one word that would tell his brother to come get him. A few seconds later he lifted his head, "Comfortable." "Excuse me, but how will the word comfortable tell your brother to come get you and the bull?" asked the postman. "My brother is a boaj - he'll read it slowly."

One morning this boaj calls his friend Joe and says "Please come over and help me. I have this killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to start it." Joe asks "What is it a puzzle of?" The boaj says "From the picture on the box, it's a tiger." Well Joe figures that he's pretty good at puzzles, so he heads over to the boaj's house. The boaj lets him in and shows him to where he has the puzzle spread all over the table. Joe studies the pieces for a moment, then studies the box. He then turns to the boAj and says: "First, no matter what I do, I'm not going to be able to show you how to assemble these pieces to look like the picture of that tiger." "Second, I suggest you relax, have a cup of coffee, and put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."

 

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