Animal Jokes

Billy Boaj was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, the Neighbor politely asked, "What are you doing there, Billy?" "My goldfish died," replied the boaj tearfully without looking up, "and I've just buried him." The neighbor was very concerned. "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?" Billy patted down the last heap of dirt then replied, "That's because he's inside your cat."

A police officer sees a boaj driving around with a pickup truck full of penguins. He pulls the boaj over and says: "You can't drive around with penguins in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately."

The boaj says OK, and drives away.

The next day, the officer sees the boaj still driving around with the truck full of penguins, and they're all wearing sun glasses. He pulls him over and demands: "I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday?"

The boaj replies: "I did ... today I'm taking them to the beach!"

Mr. Boaj, a city slicker from New York, bought a pumpkin patch.
He thought that he could make more money with chickens than the previous owner made with pumpkins.
So, he went to a poultry farm and bought 50 chickens.
"50 is a lot of chickens for that little pumpkin patch," commented the farmer.
"I am used to BIG business," Mr. Boaj replied.
A week later Mr. Boaj returned.
"I need another 50 chickens," he told the farmer.
The farmer replied, "Boy, you sure are serious about this chicken farming."
"Oh yes," Mr. Boaj replied. "I just need to iron out a few problems with these new chickens.
"Problems?" asked the farmer.
"Yeah," said Mr. Boaj, "I think I planted the first batch too close together."

A lady was picking through the frozen chickens at the supermarket, but couldn't find one big enough for her family. She turned and asked the boaj stock boy, "Do these chickens get any bigger?" "Nope,” the boaj replied, “they're dead."

A boaj was returning from the market with the crate of chicken's his father had entrusted to him, when all of a sudden the box fell and broke open. Chickens scurried off in different directions, but the determined boaj walked all over the neighborhood scooping up the wayward birds and returning them to the repaired crate. Hoping he had found them all, the boaj reluctantly returned home, expecting the worst.

"Pa, the chickens got loose," the boaj confessed sadly, "but I managed to find all twelve of them."

"Well, you did real good, son," his father beamed. "But you left with seven."

A boaj left his cat with his brother while he went on vacation for a week. When he came back, he called his brother to see when he could pick the cat up. The brother hesitated, then said, "I'm so sorry, but while you were away, the cat died."

The boaj was very upset and yelled, "You know, you could have broken the news to me better than that. When I called today, you could have said he was on the roof and wouldn't come down. Then when I called the next day, you could have said that he had fallen off and the vet was working on patching him up. Then when I called the third day, you could have said he had passed away."

The brother thought about it and apologized.

"So how's Mom?" asked the boaj.

"She's on the roof and won't come down."

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